Wise vs. Wild Contrast #6: Focus

Focus

What commands her attention

Girl-Gone-Wild: Me-Focus (getting)
Girl-Gone-Wise: Kingdom-Focus (giving)

Girl-Gone-Wild: “… she lies in wait.” Proverbs 7:12

Girl-Gone-Wise: “She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy.” Proverbs 31:20

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She looked so cute. But her appearance was at odds with her inclination. Our pretty cat, “Truffles,” had that killer instinct. It was obvious by the number of mice and birds she dragged into my kitchen and triumphantly dropped at my feet. You could also see it in her eyes. Especially when she got the evening crazies. Her eyes had this intense, focused look-highly alert for prey. The tiniest bit of movement from any small object, and she would immediately crouch into predatory stance-ears pricked forward, tip of her tail flicking, every muscle taut, ready to pounce.

If she ever spotted a bird through the window, she’d fixate on it, chatter her teeth and emit a guttural growl.  And she didn’t restrict herself to small prey. Once, our adorable little tabby trapped a repairman in the storage room. She positioned herself in the doorway. Then gnarled, spit, and threatened to attack when he tried to escape. Being a skilled predator, Truffles obviously derived pleasure from stalking, pouncing, chasing and playing with her victim. She was always on the lookout for another good hunt.

The sage father of Proverbs likened a Girl-Gone-Wild to a predator. He advised his son that this kind of woman “lies in wait.” She has a hunting instinct. She’s always alert and on the prowl. The Wild Thing focuses on what she can get. She particularly wants to get the guy. The Girl-Gone-Wise, on the other hand, focuses on what she can give. The Wise Thing extends her hands outward.  ”She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy.” (Proverbs 31:20) The Wild Thing pulls her hands inward. Hers is a predatory me-focus and not the productive kingdom-focus of the Girl-Gone-Wise.

Caught in a Trap

In the last chapter, we learned that the Girl-Gone-Wild is always out-and-about. The reason she is always out-and-about is that she is on the prowl. Like my cat, she gets the evening crazies. “Her feet do not stay at home; now in the street, now in the market, and at every corner she lies in wait.”(Proverbs 7:11-12) Lying in wait is traditional hunting behavior. The Bible often uses a hunting metaphor for people who take advantage of unsuspecting victims. It compares their behavior to animals such as lions and bears, which lie in wait to ambush their prey. (Lamentations 3:10) But the hunting metaphor it uses the most is that of the fowler. The wicked “lurk like fowlers lying in wait. They set a trap; they catch men.” (Jeremiah 5:26)

Fowlers were professional bird catchers. They supplied the marketplace with doves and other birds that people kept as caged pets. Fowlers sold wild pigeons and doves for temple sacrifices, and small birds such as partridge and quail for food. The many biblical references to the fowler and his hunting devices are likely due to the fact that Palestine lies on one of the main flight routes of certain migratory birds (Exodus 16:13). A fowler catching and selling birds would have been a common sight, and thus a concept with which the people were very familiar.

The Bible refers to the “snare of the fowler” as an alluring, but dangerous, evil trap. The traps of foolish, ungodly people are many and varied, and highly dangerous. They are often “snares of death.” (Proverbs 13:14) And this is particularly the case with a Girl-Gone-Wild, who dangles herself out as bait to catch a man. Here’s how the Bible describes her predatory behavior:

• She lurks and “lies in wait” (Proverbs 7:11-12; 23:28)
• Her “heart is snares and nets.” (Ecclesiastes 7:26 )
• Her “mouth is a deep pit.” (Proverbs 22:14)
• She “hunts down a precious life.” (Proverbs 6:26)
• She traps him like a stag in a trap or a bird in a snare. (Proverbs 7:22-23)
• Her “hands are fetters.” (Ecclesiastes 7:26)
• “He who pleases God escapes her, but the sinner is taken by her.” (Ecclesiastes 7:26 )
• Like a bird, he rushes into her snare. “It will cost him his life.” (Proverbs 7:23)

The Lord warned the men of Israel that getting involved with this ungodly type of woman would be “a snare and a trap for you, a whip on your sides and thorns in your eyes.” (Joshua 23:12-13) The sage father agreed. He warned his son that taking the bait had severe consequences. It meant spiritual death. “Her house is the way to Sheol, going down to the chambers of death.” (Proverbs 7:24)

The sage father directed his son to steer clear of Wild Things. He didn’t want him falling for the wiles of a predatory woman. If the father had written his proverbs for a daughter, he would have warned her against becoming a Wild Thing, for he knew that ultimately, the predator is just as susceptible to harm as the prey. The trap of a predatory woman doesn’t just snag the man. It also entangles her. Elsewhere in Proverbs, the father makes it clear that predators are trapped by their own devices. Their very own snares trip them up and destroy them. “For in vain is a net spread in the sight of any bird, but these [predators] lie in wait for their own blood; they set an ambush for their own lives.” (Proverbs 1:17-18) “The wicked are snared in the work of their own hands.” (Psalm 9:16)

Girls, I want to make sure that you carefully note this point: Predators will not avoid getting caught in their own traps! This is incredibly important for you to understand. I can’t stress it enough. Being out-and-about, dangling your body as bait, and lying in wait to catch a man isn’t just bad for the man who walks into your trap, it’s bad FOR YOU! It’s a foolish strategy. Ultimately, it will back fire. You will hurt yourself. You won’t find the long-term loving relationship you yearn for. Your own schemes will throw you down. You will be ensnared and injured by your own devices.

© Mary A. Kassian

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This is a pre-publication excerpt from “Girls Gone Wise in a World gone Wild,” © Mary A. Kassian to be published by Moody Publishers in 2010. All rights reserved. You are welcome to link to this post, but please do not copy and/or reproduce this copyrighted material without express written permission of Moody Publishing.

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